Dr. Malpani: You know, I’ve always been fascinated by the sheer talent some people have for giving bribes. It’s almost like a sport!
Citizen: (laughing) Oh yes, the Olympic-level skill some folks have in “greasing palms” is truly impressive. They act like bribing is some sort of magical shortcut to success.
Dr. Malpani: Exactly! They believe they’re being clever, like they’re playing chess while everyone else is playing checkers.
Citizen: Meanwhile, they’re actually just playing themselves.
Dr. Malpani: Spot on! Take the classic move: “Find the Middleman.” Because, you see, bribing directly is so outdated. The real pros know you need a seasoned fixer — someone who knows which babus prefer cash, gold, or maybe just a free dinner at a fancy five-star.
Citizen: Oh yes, the middleman — the unsung hero of corruption! They charge a “service fee” for introducing you to the right official, who then demands another “processing fee.” Before you know it, you’ve paid more in bribes than you would have spent just following the actual rules.
Dr. Malpani: Exactly! And the best part? The middleman rarely takes responsibility when things go wrong. They’ll just shrug and say, “Arre bhai, system hi aisa hai…”
Citizen: And let’s not forget the negotiation tactics! Some folks actually think they’re haggling at a flea market. “Sir, can we close this deal at ₹10,000 instead of ₹15,000?” Like they’re getting a discount on a broken fridge.
Dr. Malpani: (laughing) Right? And then there’s the VIP package for serious bribe enthusiasts. The “Fast-Track Special” where they pay extra to jump the queue. They think they’re buying speed, but all they’re really doing is training officials to expect more from everyone else.
Citizen: It’s a never-ending cycle. The more people bribe, the slower the system becomes for honest citizens. The system gets clogged with greedy officers just waiting for their next payday.
Dr. Malpani: And yet, these same people who proudly boast about “getting things done” by bribing are often the loudest complainers when corruption affects them personally.
Citizen: Of course! “Can you believe how corrupt this country has become?” they’ll whine. Meanwhile, they’ve personally bankrolled the problem.
Dr. Malpani: Precisely! What they don’t realize is that once you start bribing, you’re no longer a customer — you’re a hostage. The first bribe gets your file moving; the second one stops it from being lost; the third prevents someone from “misplacing” it entirely. It’s blackmail disguised as efficiency.
Citizen: So true! And it’s not just money that gets drained. Bribes slowly kill your dignity too. You start by giving one small “gift,” and suddenly you’re tossing cash around like confetti just to keep things from falling apart.
Dr. Malpani: Worse still, bribery doesn’t just harm the briber. Every rupee they slip under the table makes life harder for someone else — someone who doesn’t want to pay. Honest citizens are forced to wait longer because corrupt officials prioritize the bribe payers.
Citizen: And don’t forget how bribery rewards incompetence! Why bother learning your job or serving the public properly when you can just sit back and collect cash for doing nothing?
Dr. Malpani: Exactly! Bribes create lazy bureaucrats and frustrated citizens. And soon, even those who started out honest feel forced to pay, just to survive.
Citizen: So, what’s the solution? Are we doomed to live in a country where bribes are the default setting?
Dr. Malpani: Not at all! The real answer lies in standing firm. People need to realize that refusing to pay bribes isn’t just about being righteous; it’s about saving yourself from future extortion. Bribes don’t solve problems — they invite more problems.
Citizen: True! But people often feel powerless when they face officials demanding bribes. They think, “What’s one person supposed to do against the system?”
Dr. Malpani: The system thrives on silence. The moment people start speaking up, filing RTIs, and holding officials accountable, corruption starts to crack. The key is persistence. One person refusing to pay may seem small, but when enough people do it, the entire system starts to change.
Citizen: Sounds like it takes courage.
Dr. Malpani: It does. But consider this — every time you refuse to pay a bribe, you weaken the grip corruption has over others. We need citizens who are willing to fight back instead of paying up. That’s how real change happens.
Citizen: So true. I guess it’s time to stop complaining about corruption and start refusing to participate in it.
Dr. Malpani: Exactly! After all, if we keep feeding the beast, we can’t be surprised when it grows bigger. If you want to know how to fight back effectively, here’s a great resource: How to Fight Back Against Corrupt Govt Officials
Citizen: Perfect! It’s time to break the cycle. Thanks, Dr. Malpani.
Dr. Malpani: My pleasure! Now go out there and refuse to pay that next bribe. You might just change the world.